• S2E24 - When Encouragement Backfires: Reflecting Feelings and Building Esteem in Sensitive Kids

  • Aug 12 2024
  • Length: 14 mins
  • Podcast

S2E24 - When Encouragement Backfires: Reflecting Feelings and Building Esteem in Sensitive Kids

  • Summary

  • In this episode, I address a question from Nell in Ireland about using encouragement and esteem-building techniques with a sensitive child who doesn't respond well in challenging moments. I discuss the importance of ensuring our tone of voice and facial expressions are congruent with the child's emotional state, especially when they're frustrated or struggling.
    I emphasize the value of reflecting feelings before offering encouragement. This approach validates the child's emotions and creates a connection, making them more receptive to encouragement. I also touch on the necessity of setting limits when a child reacts inappropriately, such as pushing or hitting.
    Finally, I explain why we should persist with encouragement and esteem-building, even when children initially resist. These techniques communicate our belief in their capabilities, contribute to a positive self-fulfilling prophecy, and help shape their self-concept through the "looking glass self" principle. I reassure parents that as a child's self-esteem increases, so will their frustration tolerance, making them more receptive to encouragement over time.

    Ask Me Questions: Call ‪(813) 812-5525‬, or email: brenna@thekidcounselor.com
    Podcast HQ: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/
    My Newsletter Signup: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/newsletter/
    My Podcast Partner, Gabb Wireless: https://www.playtherapyparenting.com/gabb/

    Common References:
    Landreth, G.L. (2023). Play Therapy: The Art of the Relationship (4th ed.). Routledge.
    Bratton, S. C., Landreth, G. L., Kellam, T., & Blackard, S. R. (2006). Child parent relationship therapy (CPRT) treatment manual: A 10-session filial therapy model for training parents. Routledge/Taylor & Francis Group.

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