This week on Cracked Spines, Sarah did all the dang work and presents to Cyrus volume one of three Chinese danmei series for their consideration: The Disabled Tyrant's Beloved Pet Fish, The Husky and His White Cat Shizun, and You've Got Mail: The Perils of Pigeon Post. Two-thirds of them are completely insane and the last one is morally reprehensible. Guess which one Cyrus gravitated to.

Discussion includes a forty-year-old man's suicide plan being derailed by dick pics, an exploration of how exactly one manages to seduce and be seduced by a fish, the most begrudging recommendation that Sarah's ever given, and more urination featured than one might expect.

Media:
The Disabled Tyrant's Beloved Pet Fish by Xue Shan Fei Hu
The Husky and His White Cat Shizun by Rou Bao Bu Chi Rou
You've Got Mail: The Perils of Pigeon Post Blackegg

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Well, guys. The third of our recorded episodes about Gravity Falls. This is really our Return of the King. Cyrus and Sarah discuss media in-ties for a children's show--Journal Three, Lost Legends, and The Book of Bill, all written by Alex Hirsch. Sarah ponders about the challenges of adapting a story from one medium to another. Cyrus explains why Grunkle Ford is the new Hamlet. We keep remembering too late to be less horny about this, again, animated children's show. To be fair to us though--I mean, The Book of Bill is horny as hell to those with the eyes to see.

Check out the first part of our epic $94 million trilogy posted for free on our Patreon right here.

Our next episodes will be:

• Danmei Beat-Down on November 18, where Sarah makes a case for three separate danmei novels and Cyrus chooses which one they'll read in full.
• A Memory Called Empire by Arkady Martine on December 2, plus maybe A Desolation Called Peace depending on how much get-up-and-go we have.

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What does a feel-good video about compassion in nursing, a trainwreck of social ineptitude at the site of a roadside attraction, and the television show Gravity Falls all have in common? Well, they're all in this episode, kinda funny, and somehow blisteringly earnest!

After winning a prestigious Daisy Award for nursing last year, Sarah was selected for an exciting opportunity: recording a video meant to showcase her compassion and dedication set to soft piano music. Sarah doesn't quite spontaneously combust while talking about it, but it's a close thing.

Meanwhile, Cyrus recounts their renewed obsession with the television show Gravity Falls, and the stop they made at the real-life Mystery Shack on a road trip down to California. They were definitely super normal and the experience hasn't haunted their dreams in the month since this was recorded.

Originally we recorded this to be a single bonus episode about Gravity Falls, but as it turns out we had so many thoughts and feelings about things only tangentially related that we just had to turn this into a three-part series.

You can find part two, where we actually talk about Gravity Falls, uploaded for free on our Patreon right here. Part three, where we cover The Book of Bill, is right here in our main feed! It's a triple episode day!

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In today's episode, Cyrus bullies Sarah into reading a book she really enjoys. Sucker! For fans of pining, fealty, political maneuvering in a fantasy setting, and panic attacks, you can't go wrong with A Taste of Gold and Iron by Alexandra Rowland. Naturally, Sarah spends the entire episode second-guessing how to pronounce the names after literally looking it up.

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This week, we're reading Nat Cassidy's second horror novel about vampires, babies, and New York real estate that is so completely not ADA compliant. With special guest, our friend and resident horror book recommender Katie! Talking points include: navigating the inherent antisemitism of vampire mythology, Capri-sunning a human being, different types of evil landlords, and a lot a lot a lot about motherhood. I'm sure three childless adults in their thirties are really gonna be the expert on that subject.

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Cyrus saw Alien Romulus and loved it so much they immediately went back to see it a second time; Sarah saw Alien Romulus and experienced an internal crisis about the state of feminism in 2012. Somehow, we reconcile these two experiences.
Contains spoilers for all of Alien Romulus, discussions of racism, and discussions of sexual assault in the context of the Alien franchise. But mostly a lot of excited babbling about set pieces and what it means to make a great genre film.

Also, exciting news: this is our last holdover episode before we go off hiatus! As part of our new vibe, we're going to start posting our episodes in advance so ya'll can have a chance to read along if you feel so inclined. To that end, here are the episodes you can expect to hear coming up:

• Nestlings by Nat Cassidy
• A Taste of Gold and Iron by Alexandra Rowland
• DANMEI BEAT-DOWN: Sarah pitches three separate danmei novels to Cyrus with one of them becoming a future episode.

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It makes a valiant effort to try to be, but ultimately fails. We're rusty! We took the summer off! We're just vibing! We're so rusty that frankly the audio on this episode is maybe our worst ever. We're working on it, guys.

We come in fresh off watching an episode of Interview With the Vampire, and we won't shut up about it. Cyrus explains all the different types of work, including the work of having fun so you can have fun with MAXIMUM EFFICIENCY. I touch so briefly on Heaven Official's Blessing which need to convince Cyrus to read, cmon buddy it's just eight books. Shout out to Katie, you made us the creamiest falafels, we promise.

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Is there anything better than receiving package in the mail? Well, it helps if you actually enjoy the stuff inside of it. Cyrus and Sarah discuss three months worth of Illumicrate subscription boxes with the ultimate conclusion that maybe this one isn't for us. Cyrus remains a freak for body sharing. Sarah cannot resist trinkets. We also talk about the house too much, but specifically how it is trying to kill one of us, which is something we already suspected but now is a process in actual motion.

Also, hiatus! We'll be back around August with hopefully regained literacy.

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