This week on Page 7 Jackie's beltin' to MJ and Holden the totally not dated Destiny Child's song "Bug a Boo" that's been stuck in their head, Holden went with networks own editor Rob and the coulrophobia riddled Jake Young (WizBru and THE FLOOR) to see blood drenched evil demon clown led Terrifier 3, and Jackie's trying out some Fidget Puddy, aka SLIME! Jackie's true Halloween nightmare came to life with MISSING HOT DOGS at Costco and Knott's Scary Farms. Timothée Chalamet lookalike competition in Washington Square Park and attracts more than just admirers and it's THE POLICE, as well as possibly births an upcoming Jeremy Allen White lookalike competition, and a comment from MJ which leads to some Rat Boy vs Weasel Man discourse. Tom FishFucker Cruise is trending and THEY'RE TRYING TO ERASE PAGE 7 FROM BEING THE TRUE WHISTLEBLOWERS!! Jackie's chompin' at the wishbone for that Turkey Time as November approaches, Mariah Carey gets told NOT YET in her get out and vote promo, Stevie Nicks gave an amazing interview to Rolling Stone in which she told Katy Perry to STAY OFF THE INTERNET while giving Chappell Roan a warning to not burn themselves out early due that INSANE schedule. Speaking of Chappell, they called out that photographer AGAIN, this time at Olivia Rodrigo's movie premiere, and in Celebrity Conspiracy Corner: Are Vin Diesel and The Rock Secret Agents (But NOT Lovers)?!?! On The List - Celebrities who say they've lived in real haunted houses and it's got MJ asking some questions, Blindz and MOOOORE ON THIS HAUNTING HALLOWEeEeeEEeEEeEN!!!

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