All of us want to "seen" by the people around us. We want to be recognized as unique individuals. Yet the experience of being seen in this way can be dispiritingly rare. This week, we kick off our "Relationships 2.0" series by talking with researcher Allison Pugh about the psychological benefits of what she calls "connective labor." She explains why this labor is often overlooked, and how to cultivate the superpower of making other people feel seen.

In this episode, you'll learn:

*The definition of connective labor, and why this skill is like "engine grease" for our personal and professional relationships.

*Why connective labor is vital to success in a surprisingly broad array of careers.

*The gender stereotypes around connective labor, and why these stereotypes overlook the role that men play as connectors.

*How connective labor affects our mental and physical health.

*How connective labor by teachers may affect students' ability to learn.

*How to slow down in interactions with other people and explore the emotional context behind their words.

If you have a follow-up question for Allison Pugh after listening to this episode, and you’d be willing to share it with the Hidden Brain audience, please record a voice memo on your phone. Once you’ve done so, email it to us at ideas@hiddenbrain.org. Use the subject line “connection.” And thanks for listening!

Often in life, we find ourselves wrestling with a decision. But in running these mental calculations, there's something we rarely consider about the future: we might not be the same person when we get there. This week, philosopher L.A. Paul explores how life-altering events reshape who we are.

Want more of our work on understanding your future self? Give these Hidden Brain episodes a listen:

https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-how-to-see-yourself-clearly/

https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-decide-already/

https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/you-2-0-your-future-is-now/

https://hiddenbrain.org/podcast/the-ventilator/

And for the latest insights about human behavior, delivered straight to your inbox, sign up for the weekly Hidden Brain newsletter! Each issue brings you the latest research, along with a brain teaser and a moment of joy. You can read and subscribe here: https://news.hiddenbrain.org/

Have you ever been falsely accused of something? Many of us think there’s only one way we’d act in such a situation: we’d defend ourselves. We’d do whatever it takes to clear our name — and above all else, we’d never, ever confess to something we didn’t do. But psychologist Saul Kassin says that’s a myth. This week, we bring you a favorite 2022 episode about why we sometimes act against our own self-interest — even when the stakes are at their highest.

In this week's episode, you'll learn about:

• Why we often freeze and fail to defend ourselves when someone accuses us of something
• The various types of false confessions
• What happens in our minds when we're pressured to confess to something that we didn't actually do
• How police interrogation tactics are being used in workplaces and other organizations
• Potential solutions to the problem of false confessions

For more on the psychological dimensions of criminal justice, check out our episode on the infamous Stanford prison experiment.

And if you'd like to check out the research of Saul Kassin and others on this topic, visit our web page for this episode.

Episode image by Tama66, Pixabay.