Episodes

  • The 3 Fuels of Anger-2

    The 3 Fuels of Anger-2
    Nov 14 2024
    What started as an idea for one episode covering the 3 Fuels of Anger has become 2 episodes. We hope it won't anger you if we stretch it to 3.....The Session: The 3 Fuels of AngerEcclesiastes 7:9 Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.1. FearThose things that we fear in life also fuel our anger. A good example when I was a school teacher I also had a fear of heights. My children regularly helped me remember that.How did I react? I got angry.2. Frustration A good example of frustration would be the Cleveland Browns. They seem to be improving and then they make for trades or changes that keep them unsuccessful.3. HurtA good example here would be when someone says something that crosses your boundaries and hurts. You could also be something they forget to do like remember an anniversary or a birthday.TreatmentThat’s why it’s so vital for us to learn how to recognize the warning signs (and put a stop to it) when those feelings first begin.The communication highway helps with anger managementWhen a person feels hurt, they should speak in terms of an eye statement. I feel . . . . when . . . . .The listener hears and reflects, validates and empathizes PrayerPray that God helps you with the presence of the fruit of the SpiritJames 1:19-20 My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.Dealing with Anger...God's WayTransforming Feelings into God's Peace Through Self-ControlJoyce MeyerWe have all experienced anger at some point in our lives, and it can be a real problem. Though it starts as a harmless feeling, it can quickly grow into something dangerous that’s hard to control.But with God’s help, we can learn how to deal with our feelings and walk in His peace.I’ll admit, years ago I pretty much did and said anything I felt like. I have a pretty strong personality, so if you said something to upset me, there was a good chance I would let you know about it.Thank God, over time He changed me through His Word and helped me begin to manage my emotions through the power of His Holy Spirit.I learned how to operate in self-control, which means I didn’t always say everything I wanted to say. Now, that’s freedom!Along the way, God also helped me to understand that anger in itself isn’t wrong...Is It a Sin to Be Angry?I’ll never forget one particular morning about 25 years ago. I was preparing to go preach at a ladies meeting at my church in St. Louis when my husband Dave and I got into an argument. I admit, I was really mad!I continued to think angry thoughts and have angry feelings. Then my anger turned into guilt and I thought, How can I possibly go to church and tell others how to conduct their lives according to Scripture if I cannot control my anger?The feelings of guilt not only continued but they intensified. As the pressure mounted, I started to feel almost frantic when suddenly God spoke to my heart and said:“Anger is not a sin—it is what you do with it that becomes sin.” That day God showed me something that was very life-changing for me. He brought me to Ephesians 4:26-27 (AMPC), and I suddenly saw these verses in a different way than ever before.The Bible says, When angry, do not sin; do not ever let your wrath (your exasperation, your fury or indignation) last until the sun goes down. Leave no [such] room or foothold for the devil [give no opportunity to him].These verses don’t say, “Don’t get angry” or “If you ever get angry.” They say, “When [you are] angry.”We’re all going to be angry at times, but it’s not feeling anger that’s a problem. The problem comes when we act on those feelings.At times, I’ve really wished some of my feelings would go away, but usually they don’t. I’ve learned that God is not necessarily going to change them, but He is going to change me so I can be stronger than they are.We need to be in touch with our feelings and take responsibility for them, but we can’t allow them to control us.Dealing with Anger at Its OnsetSome people have been upset for so long that they don’t even realize they’re angry anymore.For many years, I was angry about being abused by my father when I was a child, yet I wasn’t really even conscious of the fact that I was mad about it.Although I was attempting to be a loving Christian, I was angry and harsh and hard. I loved God, but I hadn’t gotten serious enough with Him to say, “I want to do things Your way and I need Your help.”Proverbs 16:32 (ESV) says, Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.A person who rules their spirit demonstrates self-control. Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit that’s given to us to help us control ourselves.This means when we feel a certain way, we canchoose not to act on it if we know it’s ...
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    25 mins
  • The 3 Fuels of Anger-Part 1

    The 3 Fuels of Anger-Part 1
    Nov 7 2024
    What started as an idea for one episode covering the 3 Fuels of Anger has become 2 episodes, with Scott pouring out his anger issues for you and Tom to sort out. Who's bright idea was this?The Session: The 3 Fuels of AngerEcclesiastes 7:9 Do not be quickly provoked in your spirit, for anger resides in the lap of fools.1. FearThose things that we fear in life also fuel our anger. A good example when I was a school teacher I also had a fear of heights. My children regularly helped me remember that.How did I react? I got angry.2. Frustration A good example of frustration would be the Cleveland Browns. They seem to be improving and then they make for trades or changes that keep them unsuccessful.3. HurtA good example here would be when someone says something that crosses your boundaries and hurts. You could also be something they forget to do like remember an anniversary or a birthday.TreatmentThat’s why it’s so vital for us to learn how to recognize the warning signs (and put a stop to it) when those feelings first begin.The communication highway helps with anger managementWhen a person feels hurt, they should speak in terms of an eye statement. I feel . . . . when . . . . .The listener hears and reflects, validates and empathizes PrayerPray that God helps you with the presence of the fruit of the SpiritJames 1:19-20 My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.Dealing with Anger...God's WayTransforming Feelings into God's Peace Through Self-ControlJoyce MeyerWe have all experienced anger at some point in our lives, and it can be a real problem. Though it starts as a harmless feeling, it can quickly grow into something dangerous that’s hard to control.But with God’s help, we can learn how to deal with our feelings and walk in His peace.I’ll admit, years ago I pretty much did and said anything I felt like. I have a pretty strong personality, so if you said something to upset me, there was a good chance I would let you know about it.Thank God, over time He changed me through His Word and helped me begin to manage my emotions through the power of His Holy Spirit.I learned how to operate in self-control, which means I didn’t always say everything I wanted to say. Now, that’s freedom!Along the way, God also helped me to understand that anger in itself isn’t wrong...Is It a Sin to Be Angry?I’ll never forget one particular morning about 25 years ago. I was preparing to go preach at a ladies meeting at my church in St. Louis when my husband Dave and I got into an argument. I admit, I was really mad!I continued to think angry thoughts and have angry feelings. Then my anger turned into guilt and I thought, How can I possibly go to church and tell others how to conduct their lives according to Scripture if I cannot control my anger?The feelings of guilt not only continued but they intensified. As the pressure mounted, I started to feel almost frantic when suddenly God spoke to my heart and said:“Anger is not a sin—it is what you do with it that becomes sin.” That day God showed me something that was very life-changing for me. He brought me to Ephesians 4:26-27 (AMPC), and I suddenly saw these verses in a different way than ever before.The Bible says, When angry, do not sin; do not ever let your wrath (your exasperation, your fury or indignation) last until the sun goes down. Leave no [such] room or foothold for the devil [give no opportunity to him].These verses don’t say, “Don’t get angry” or “If you ever get angry.” They say, “When [you are] angry.”We’re all going to be angry at times, but it’s not feeling anger that’s a problem. The problem comes when we act on those feelings.At times, I’ve really wished some of my feelings would go away, but usually they don’t. I’ve learned that God is not necessarily going to change them, but He is going to change me so I can be stronger than they are.We need to be in touch with our feelings and take responsibility for them, but we can’t allow them to control us.Dealing with Anger at Its OnsetSome people have been upset for so long that they don’t even realize they’re angry anymore.For many years, I was angry about being abused by my father when I was a child, yet I wasn’t really even conscious of the fact that I was mad about it.Although I was attempting to be a loving Christian, I was angry and harsh and hard. I loved God, but I hadn’t gotten serious enough with Him to say, “I want to do things Your way and I need Your help.”Proverbs 16:32 (ESV) says, Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.A person who rules their spirit demonstrates self-control. Self-control is a fruit of the Spirit that’s given to us to help us control ourselves.This means when we feel a certain way, we ...
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    25 mins
  • The Session: Extending & Receiving Grace

    The Session: Extending & Receiving Grace
    Oct 31 2024

    The Session: The Power of Extending & Receiving Grace

    Ephesians 2:8 “For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith—and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God…”

    The Impact of Receiving Grace What are the benefits of grace to Christian?

    Dr. Gregory Jantz wrote, “But grace is much more than just erasing the past; it is about writing the future. That’s because when we are freed from the thicket of regret, blame, and shame, we can show grace to others in every situation. It’s the ultimate form of “paying it forward.” Only Jesus has already paid our tab..”

    What are the benefits of grace to Christian?

    According to Sermon Central, Grace brings 10 great benefits to our lives:

    • We are SAVED by GRACE. The only way to Heaven is through the doorway of grace. ...
    • We're FORGIVEN by GRACE. ...
    • We're SUSTAINED by GRACE. ...
    • We're HEALED by GRACE. ...
    • We're LIBERATED by GRACE. ...
    • We're given TALENTS by GRACE. ...
    • We're USED by GRACE. ...
    • We're KEPT SAVED by GRACE.

    Receiving Grace Can Set Us Free

    • His grace sets us free from the bondage of the things that hold us back. When we turn to Him, we can experience that kind release and that kind of freedom in our lives. Because of grace, Jesus died on the cross for us. It was the ultimate sacrifice to set us free.

    · John 8:32 “And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.”

    • Grace is said to set people free from sin and its power, as well as from the punishment of sin. Grace is also said to free people from the bondage of guilt.

    The Impact of Extending Grace

    Marion Star said, “Grace gives us a new life which is not condemned by God. Through God's grace we are forgiven, transforming our thinking, resulting in the renewal of our mind and heart. Through grace we live the kind of life that God would like every one of His children to experience. “

    Grace leads to peace

    • 2 Peter 1 says, “Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God and of Jesus our love Lord. His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of Him who called us by His own glory and goodness” (vs. 2-3)

    Rev. J Street wrote, “The definition of grace could be “God's life, power and righteousness given to us by unmerited favor.” It is through grace that God works effective change in our hearts and lives. Grace gives us a new life which is not condemned by God. Through God's grace we are forgiven, transforming our thinking, resulting in the renewal of our mind and heart.”

    Ephesians 4:29 NIV

    • Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen,”

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    25 mins
  • The Session-Down Syndrome from a Parent's Point of View-2

    The Session-Down Syndrome from a Parent's Point of View-2
    Oct 24 2024

    Sorry, no show notes for this one. This is the first of a two-episode conversation I had with my daughter, Erin about her daughter, Allison. My hope is that our conversation raises awareness about just how truly beautiful and special kids with exceptionalities are, and that they have a role in our world today.
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    25 mins
  • The Session-Down Syndrome From a Parent's Point of View-1

    The Session-Down Syndrome From a Parent's Point of View-1
    Oct 17 2024

    Sorry, no show notes for this one. This is the first of a two-episode conversation I had with my daughter, Erin about her daughter, Allison. My hope is that our conversation raises awareness about just how truly beautiful and special kids with exceptionalities are, and that they have a role in our world today.
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    25 mins
  • The Session: Faith & the Difference it makes in our lives

    The Session: Faith & the Difference it makes in our lives
    Oct 10 2024

    The Session: How We Are Different Because of Faith

    And without faith it is impossible to please Him, for he who comes to God must believe that He is and that He is a rewarder of those who seek Him." (Hebrews 11:6)

    We Will be More Confident

    • The writer of Hebrews 11:1-2 explains faith like this, “Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see. This is what the ancients were commended for.”
    • We are more confident in our decisions

    We will have a Godly Worldview

    • By faith, we understand that the universe was formed at God‘s command so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible
    • We will by face put confidence in Psalm 139:13 “For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb"

    We Will Be More at Peace

    • II Corinthians 12:9,
    • “But he said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness. Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.’” So when we are weak in our faith our God is made strong.

    We will be confident to Do More Challenging Things

    • Paul writes in Philippians 4:13, “I can do all things through him who gives me strength.”
    • Psalm 46:1 is also an encouragement when we face struggles, “God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.

    We will have more faith when God appears silent

    Isaiah 55:8-9 tells us, “‘For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,’ declares the Lord. ‘As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.’”

    Joyce Meyer writes, “The tendency to want to know about everything that's going on can be detrimental to your Christian walk. Sometimes knowing everything can be uncomfortable and can even hurt you.”

    How are we better or different physically emotionally and spiritually because of Faith

    Mental and emotional impact:

    • Faith can provide a sense of comfort, purpose, and support, which can mitigate stress and anxiety, leading to positive physical outcomes.
    • No direct physical alteration: There's no scientific evidence that faith itself directly changes the structure or function of the human body on a biological level.
    • Individual variations: The impact of faith on physical health can differ greatly based on personal beliefs, practices, and individual circumstances.

    In Counselling the Culturally Diverse Theory and Practice (2016), it says, “it appears that people require faith as well as reason to be healthy and that psychology may profit from allowing the spirit to re-join matters of the mind and body.” It seems that society is seeing the importance of the Spirit as well. His ways are not our ways.”

    Events like this happen so that God can grow our faith. It is important that we approach them with patience.

    Action Point

    It is important that we grow our faith in God’s timing. To do that we also have to grow our trust in Him.
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    25 mins
  • The Session: ADD/ADHD

    The Session: ADD/ADHD
    Oct 3 2024

    School's been in session for a bit, maybe you're noticing some changes in your child. Maybe their teacher is telling you about some behavioral issue. It could be Attention Deficit Disorder, or Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder. In this episode, Tom & Scott talk about some symptoms and possible treatments.

    The Session: AAD/ADHD SYMPTOMS AND TREATMENT

    Romans 5:4-5, “Suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.” Notice that hope comes from character, which comes from perseverance, which comes from suffering.

    Inattentive ADHD, your greatest struggle will come from problems such as high distractibility and feeling zoned out. Due to the challenges you face with focus and attention, you are more likely to avoid tasks requiring sustained mental effort.

    Inattentive ADHD makes it difficult for you to complete tasks and stay organized. It can also make you feel impatient or moody. These things can affect your relationships, as well as your performance in school, at work or during activities.

    Symptoms and Causes

    What are the symptoms of inattentive ADHD?

    The symptoms of inattentive ADHD include having trouble or difficulty with the following behaviors:

    • Paying attention to the details and/or making frequent mistakes while doing tasks.
    • Staying focused on long-winded tasks (like reading, listening to a presentation, etc.).
    • Listening to others.
    • Following through on tasks or obligations. You can easily lose focus in the middle of a task.
    • Managing time and meeting deadlines.
    • Performing tasks that need significant brain power, like filling out forms or writing reports.
    • Keeping track of common items needed to complete everyday tasks (pencil, wallet, keys, phone, etc.).
    • Staying in the moment without distractions.
    • Remembering to complete routine tasks (chores, errands, appointments, etc.).

    Although everyone experiences problems paying attention and focusing at times, if you have inattentive ADHD, you’ll experience these symptoms so often that they interfere with your daily functioning at school, at work, with friends and family or in social situations.

    What are the causes of inattentive ADHD?

    The cause of inattentive ADHD is unclear. Research suggests the following may contribute to ADHD:

    • Genetics.
    • Anatomical makeup of your brain (how certain areas of your brain form and function).

    Is inattentive ADHD hereditary?

    Studies show that inattentive ADHD can run in your biological family, so you’re more at risk of developing it if someone related to you has it.

    School Related Symptoms ADHD/ADD

    • Relationship struggles
    • Inability to write on grade appropriate levels on paper
    • Activity out of their seats in class and very obstinate about returning to their seats
    • Not paying attention and disturbing their neighbor sitting next to them in class

    Normalizing ADHD/ADD

    • Almost everyone has one condition or another. Some people are Dyslexic, some wear glasses, some have Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, Asperger Syndrome, Tourettes Syndrome , some have Sleep Apnea,
    • Christians should be patient and have compassion on anyone who has a condition that makes their life more difficult than someone who doesn’t have one. After all, God created them that way for a reason and a purpose - who are Christians or anyone else to say that they are not worthy of kindness and respect? Everyone should view and treat people with these or other conditions as nothing less than people.

    Treatment

    • Doing homework (From Scott...this sounded funny to me too. So I grilled Tom about it on the episode. Give it a listen!)
    • Sitting through dinner
    • Changing activities
    • Playing quietly
    • Paying attention
    • Support groups for parents
    • Cognitive behavioral therapy
    • Anger management
    • Family therapy
    • Psychoeducational therapy

    Medication

    • Relexxii
    • Medication’s release neurotransmitters in the brain that help level out ADD
    • dopamine and norepinephrine.
    • Vyvanse
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    25 mins
  • The Session: Being a Blessing During Pastor Appreciation Month

    The Session: Being a Blessing During Pastor Appreciation Month
    Sep 26 2024

    October is Pastor Appreciation Month. In this episode, Tom & Scott share some ideas on how to bless your Pastor (AND their families) this October...and really, all year!

    The Session: Pastor Appreciation Month

    1 Thessalonians 5:12–13 (NIV): “Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other.”

    Pick a different strategy for the week. Do it every day of the week. Do this for the entire month of October. (From Scott: This kinda sounds like Tom's goal setting strategies too)

    1 Thessalonians 5:12–13 (NIV): “Now we ask you, brothers and sisters, to acknowledge those who work hard among you, who care for you in the Lord and who admonish you. Hold them in the highest regard in love because of their work. Live in peace with each other.”

    Here are some ways to bless pastors during pastor Appreciation Month

    • Pray: Pray for your pastor's spiritual vitality, protection from Satan, and the grace and love of God. You can also pray for their family.
    • Give a gift card: A gift card to a restaurant or an Amazon or iTunes card can be a great gift for a pastor.
    • Post pictures with the pastor: Share pictures of yourself and the pastor at church events on social media.
    • Adopt a local church: Send a care package to another church in your area or serve together with another local church.
    • Speak encouraging words: Let your pastor know how the Lord has changed you.
    • Write a note: Write a note with encouraging feedback about their sermon.
    • Set out a gift basket: Set out a gift basket in the church lobby for members to leave notes and gifts.
    • Mow the pastor's lawn: Mow the pastor's lawn when their family is on vacation or ministry
    • Connect with the church office manager. Find out your pastors likes and needs and organize a plan to meet them
    • Encourage time off and 48 hour getaways!
    • Develop assistant pastors who can carry some of the load
    • Encourage the pastor to
    • Plan for more than Sundays.

    Resources

    • Remember the pastor's role is 24-7; assign a person or persons to be on-call to help in emergencies. Identify people within the church who can counsel or advise others whether that means listening to problems or pointing them to a professional. Also, before your pastor hits the beach, determine the type of events about which he or she would like to be contacted. (Resource UMC)

    • The Gravity Community is an online community of practice for Christians to stay connected and learn together in an environment that's safe for questions and doubts. Join the Gravity Community for connection and support for struggling pastors.
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    25 mins