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  • The Tao of Fully Feeling

  • Harvesting Forgiveness out of Blame
  • By: Pete Walker
  • Narrated by: Christopher Grove
  • Length: 13 hrs and 3 mins
  • 4.5 out of 5 stars (103 ratings)
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The Tao of Fully Feeling

By: Pete Walker
Narrated by: Christopher Grove
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Summary

The price of emotional renunciation is a constant, wasteful expenditure of energy that leaves us depressed and taciturn, imprisoned in the apathy and ennui of the "seen that, been there, done that" syndrome. When we surrender and soften to our feelings, we reconnect with our inborn vitality and with the invaluable instinct and intuition that our feelings naturally carry.  

The Tao of Fully Feeling describes the middle ground of emotional aliveness that lies between emotional deadness and emotional explosiveness. It helps us to soften and relax into our feelings without exiling them or enshrining them. It guides us to be emotionally expressive in benign, intimacy-enhancing ways.  

The Tao of Fully Feeling teaches us to respond to our painful and potentially disruptive feelings in healthy ways. It illustrates the enriching aspects of the so-called negative emotions and helps us achieve the emotional flexibility whereby sadness easily mellows into solace, anger unfolds into laughter, fear evolves into excitement, jealousy opens up into appreciation, and blame gives way to forgiveness.  

The Tao of Fully Feeling refutes the black-and-white notion that blame is never justifiable. It describes safe, nondestructive ways of feeling and expressing blame - ways that ironically enhance our capacity to feel genuine forgiveness.  

When we authentically forgive our parents, we know what we are forgiving them for and what specifically was blameworthy about their behavior in the first place. When we forgive before we blame, we risk dragging the full weight of our childhood hurt and anger around forever, like an exhausted backpacker who is too dulled and over-trusting to notice that someone has put a boulder in his/her pack.

©1995 Pete Walker (P)2019 Tantor

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I am NOT finding the narration poor, it's FINE!

Just wanted to counter the number of reviews complaining about the narration. I don't know what's wrong with it. He's not shouting, it's a normal enough (American) accent. I don't get it.
I'm only about 3 hours in and this is a very easy book to listen to, I'm finding it easier listening than his first book which was very intense I guess. This is kind of soothing for somebody whose parents never listened, and used shame and manipulation to keep me in line. We're estranged at the moment and they will only make up if I accept their narrative that they're perfect and I'm to blame. I am listening to this relating to a lot.
UPDATE, this is an amazing listen. Normally I drift off if I listen to audios for too long but this held my attention absolutely. It was soothing and hopeful without ever being remotely trite. I understand now that the way to the peace of forgiveness is through anger. I will get to the point where the anger passes and that will be it. Forcing forgiveness prematurely is not pushed here.

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Powerful and transformative

A challenge for the soul but something that EVERYONE should read. Pete raises topics that will touch feelings that you've been burying for years but he does so with validation and grace. It took me a long time to finish this book becuse it spoke to the child in me so much. Now that I am at the end I want to listen again. Life changing, especially for people who feel deeply.

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Groundbreaking

Pete Walker’s discoveries and writing here have been nothing short of revolutionary for me. Both The Tao of Fully Feeling and complex PTSD books have been instrumental in my understanding and recovery from the grip of childhood trauma that had continued to adversely affect life as an adult. Thank you very much, Pete!

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A Powerful Listen!

As part of my Healing journey from CPTSD , I have absorbed this book over the past month. I've found it to be helpful, well written, engaging and very much spoke to me.

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A powerful book

This is a powerful book about child abuse and the power of self-parenting which a skill that I believe should be taught in schools.

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very helpful book

This is the second book I read from Pete Walker. There is so much helpful information in here, I recommend it to anyone who has experienced CPTSD or has a loved one who is suffering from it.

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Thank you!

A life changing read for someone who has suffered for nearly 50 years from Cptsd and only recently been diagnosed.
I think the benefits from reading and listening to this book will echo through my life…. Thank you so very much….

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The book I didn't know I needed

This book surprised me. I expected something completely different judging by the title. I have both CPTSD and PTSD, nothing helped me to free myself from my pain as this book did. I'm happy and grateful 🤍

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..so far on my 4th listen!

What a journey this book has taken me. Delivering incredible insight and bringing about an awakening into the hidden psychological abuse within families. This book helped me finally identify the many layers of abuse I experienced throughout my childhood but what came as a revelation is seeing it is on going. I learned so much about myself through this book and as a result I am making an effort to finally allow myself to feel.
Life changing.

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Life saver

Gets to the core of childhood abuse and gives hope for recovery . I have shared it extensively

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