• Ep. 167 Maybe You're NOT the Problem.
    Nov 20 2024

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    Look spacemen, it takes a true spaceman to admit when they're wrong and an even truer one to admit when their wife is wrong. On today's episode, we do just that.

    We don't actually admit to being wrong, but Mike and Rob talk about how men are the problem in relationships. We're not saying women are, but we are saying we need to stop blaming men for everything. You're doing a good job. Could you do better? Sure! That's why you listen to The Manspace (which, coincidentally, is how I know you are doing a good job). So keep your chin up. Listen in and be not the problem.

    Keywords

    relationships, men's roles, communication, societal expectations, sexual desires, self-improvement, emotional connection, therapy, understanding, feedback loops

    Takeaways

    • Men need to learn a different relationship with sex.
    • It's important for men to express their feelings.
    • Women often perceive men as the problem in relationships.
    • Men are doing better than they think they are.
    • Communication is key in understanding each other.
    • Societal expectations can distort perceptions of men.
    • Feedback loops in relationships are crucial to understand.
    • Men should not feel like they are the only ones at fault.
    • It's essential to focus on the couple you want to be.
    • Self-improvement is a shared responsibility in relationships.

    Sound Bites

    • "I'm just glad to be here."
    • "Don't screw this up."
    • "Men are not the problem."

    Chapters

    00:00
    Rant on Gender Roles in Relationships

    00:32
    Exploring Emotional Regulation

    03:37
    Cultural References and Music Discussions

    07:35
    Introduction and Anticipation for Upcoming Events

    10:32
    Understanding Men's Role in Relationships

    12:35
    The Perception of Men in Society

    14:46
    Expectations and Criticism in Relationships

    16:39
    The Importance of Communication and Understanding

    18:33
    Men's Emotional Needs and Societal Pressures

    20:32
    The Distortion of Relationships and Control

    22:40
    The Impact of Societal Norms on Relationships

    24:35
    Men's Responsibility in Relationships

    26:45
    The Role of Sex in Relationships

    28:37
    The Need for Emotional Connection

    30:44
    Challenging Gender Stereotypes

    32:33
    The Importance of Mutual Understanding

    34:44
    Final Thoughts on Relationship Dynamics

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    44 mins
  • Ep. 166 Laugh it Off: The Importance of Humor in Relationships
    Nov 13 2024

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    Dudes. You should laugh at stuff more. Honestly, when was the last time you laughed your crack off? I mean, besides the Manspace, obviously. Turns out humor is extremely helpful.

    On today's episode, Matt, Mike, and Rob break down how humor can enhance our relationships, increase connection, and improve creativity. You should listen to the episode and then make a fart joke during your next fight. It'll totally work. Maybe.

    keywords

    humor, sarcasm, relationships, communication, therapy, pop culture, emotional intelligence, self-deprecating humor, interpersonal dynamics, coping mechanisms

    takeaways

    • Humor can be a powerful tool in relationships.
    • Sarcasm can sometimes be misunderstood and may hurt feelings.
    • Reading the room is essential when using humor.
    • Humor should enhance connections, not diminish them.
    • Self-deprecating humor can be a safe target.
    • Using humor can help diffuse tension in difficult conversations.
    • It's important to know when humor is appropriate.
    • Pop culture references can enrich discussions about humor.
    • Humor can provide a new perspective on serious topics.
    • Navigating humor requires emotional intelligence.

    Sound Bites

    • "I have to see humor."
    • "Humor can diffuse tension."
    • "Read the room."

    Chapters

    00:00
    Exploring Humor Types and Their Impact

    11:23
    Understanding Self-Defeating Humor

    20:35
    The Role of Humor in Relationships

    26:38
    Navigating Humor and Seriousness

    38:54
    The Impact of Humor on Communication

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    40 mins
  • Ep. 165 Living without Fear: The Fearless Mind Book Review
    Nov 6 2024

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    No fear bro. Grip it and rip it. Live free or die hard. Come and take it. And other such sundry fearless phrases. That's what's happening today. We're facing our fears. Well, more just talking about how to live without fear.

    Today, we review the book The Fearless Mind by Craig Manning. Matt, Mike, and Rob talk about how to have more focus on process, being more task oriented, and worrying less about the outcomes. I bet you thought AI generated that last sentence. Well it didn't. I'm just that good...or bad? Either way, listen in and lose your fear!

    Keywords

    No Fear, 90s nostalgia, self-regulation, ego, task-mindedness, deliberate practice, feedback, personal development, relationships, The Fearless Mind

    Takeaways

    • Nostalgia can evoke strong memories and connections.
    • Self-regulation is key to personal growth and focus.
    • Ego-mindedness can hinder performance and growth.
    • Deliberate practice is essential for mastery in any field.
    • Feedback should be direct but not sugarcoated.
    • The role of a coach is to guide and sometimes gatekeep.
    • Improvement is a process that requires self-reflection.
    • Focus on what you can control in relationships.
    • Personal development is a lifelong journey.
    • Engaging in the process can lead to fulfillment and happiness.

    Chapters

    00:00
    Exploring the Fearless Mind Book

    05:07
    Key Insights from The Fearless Mind

    10:57
    Deliberate Practice and Ego Mindset

    17:02
    Externalizing Problems in Therapy

    24:41
    Taking Responsibility in Clinical Practice

    25:17
    Gatekeeping in Education and Therapy

    26:23
    The Role of Emotion in Therapy

    28:21
    The Challenge of High Performance Coaching

    30:00
    Critiques of Coaching Styles

    33:18
    The Importance of Self-Reflection

    35:16
    Journaling for Improvement

    36:40
    Shifting Focus from Negativity to Growth

    40:14
    The Process of Continuous Improvement

    43:35
    Encouraging Client Growth and Self-Discovery

    47:52
    Key Takeaways from the Conversation

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    1 hr and 4 mins
  • Ep. 164 Maybe YOU'RE the Problem
    Oct 30 2024

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    SPACEMEN!!!! I think we've solved it for good this time. I know I've said that before, but this time, we really nailed it. And by we, I mean Rob. It's the Rob show today. Finally, Or unfortunately. Just Rob rambling on about who knows what.

    I know what. Rob talks about looking at yourself in the relationship and taking responsibility to change things. Far too many people get stuck looking at and blaming the other person. Well guess what? You're the problem. Listen in as Rob lists off your flaws.

    Takeaways

    • Therapy can feel like an uphill battle for couples.
    • Cultural narratives often portray men as the problem in relationships.
    • Self-reflection is crucial for improving relationship dynamics.
    • Both partners need to take responsibility for their actions.
    • Men often feel afraid of their wives due to judgmental tones.
    • Women may react harshly due to feeling overwhelmed.
    • Communication styles can significantly impact relationship health.
    • It's important to ask, 'What is my part in this?'
    • Therapists can help couples see beyond surface-level issues.

    Sound Bites

    • "Hi, it's me. I'm the problem. It's me."
    • "It's a little bit like doing a video journal."
    • "I've noticed this thing recently..."

    Chapters

    00:00
    Introduction to the Solo Journey

    01:24
    Reflections on Therapy and Relationships

    05:14
    Understanding 'Walk Away Wife Syndrome'

    09:00
    The Dynamics of Fear in Relationships

    19:17
    Cultural Narratives and Relationship Dynamics

    23:42
    The Importance of Self-Reflection in Relationships

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    32 mins
  • Ep. 162 The Power of Positive Feedback
    Oct 23 2024

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    Spacemen, you're remarkable. You're doing a great job. Probably. I mean, you're listening to the show, so clearly you're trying to improve yourself. So nice work.

    On today's episode, we talk about the effectiveness of positive feedback and how, unfortunately, we're not so great at it. Research shows over and over that we get better results from positive feedback, but we're often afraid that if we don't highlight what was wrong, it won't get fixed. We'll that's just stupid. Stop thinking that. Listen to the episode. We'll get you fixed.

    Takeaways

    • Specific feedback is crucial for both praise and correction.
    • Positive reinforcement can lead to better outcomes than negative feedback.
    • Generational differences affect how feedback is received and interpreted.
    • Building trust in relationships allows for more effective communication.
    • Focusing on what to add rather than what to eliminate can be more motivating.
    • Nostalgia and humor can create a comfortable space for serious discussions.
    • Understanding the motivations behind feedback can improve relationships.
    • Encouragement should be genuine and specific to be effective.
    • Recognizing individual strengths can help in personal development.
    • The way we communicate feedback can shape our relationships significantly.

    Sound Bites

    • "Quit playing with your dinghy!"
    • "I would take 50 Chris Farley movies!"

    Chapters

    00:00
    The Role of Encouragement in Parenting

    06:49
    The Impact of Feedback on Generations

    09:50
    The Balance of Positive and Negative Feedback

    11:37
    Cultural Influences on Motivation

    15:46
    The Power of Positive Reinforcement

    18:28
    The Importance of Genuine Feedback

    24:58
    Understanding Motivation and Support

    24:59
    The Power of Hope and Expectancy

    25:20
    The Importance of Specific Feedback

    26:18
    Understanding Motivation Behind Actions

    27:26
    Balancing Positive and Negative Feedback

    28:38
    The Impact of Harsh Feedback

    29:41
    Recognizing Internal Struggles

    30:55
    The Challenge of Improvement

    31:49
    Communication in Relationships

    33:21
    The Role of Specificity in Feedback

    36:27
    Defining by Negatives vs. Positives

    40:28
    The Importance of Adding Positives

    43:50
    Healthy Relational Ethics

    46:27
    The Value of Genuine Praise

    49:43
    Building Trust Through Feedback

    51:20
    The Power of Positive Reinforcement

    54:09
    Focusing on Desired Outcomes

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    57 mins
  • Ep. 162 What If I Don't Like My Spouse Anymore?
    Oct 16 2024

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    Look spacemen, probably the only thing you need to know about this episode is that Matt does not like Ryan Reynolds. You should probably let Ryan know on social media. If I know him like I think I do, he'll want to come on our show and rectify that. I should also make a formal clarification--this episode is NOT brought to you by Ryan Reynolds or any of his affiliate companies.

    We do talk about other things on this episode too. Specifically what to do if you lost that liking feeling for your spouse. We've all had some level of that feeling. But it turns out, there are some things you can do about it. I know you want me to tell you what, but I want you to do your own work. I gotta watch Monday Night Football.

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    49 mins
  • Ep. 161 The Benefits of Slow Living
    Oct 9 2024

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    Spacemen, pull up a chair. Take a load off. Just relax and be in the Space. You got nothing better to do. On today's episode, we talk about the massive impact of slowing down your life--from your thoughts to your intentions and actions inside your relationship. If you're lucky, we'll even quote Miley Cyrus. But you gotta slow down to hear it.

    takeaways

    • Slow living prioritizes mindfulness and intentionality.
    • Engaging in the process can lead to greater satisfaction.
    • Technology often distracts us from meaningful experiences.
    • Quality over quantity is essential for a fulfilling life.
    • Finding balance is crucial in a fast-paced world.
    • The journey is often more rewarding than the destination.
    • Simplifying tasks can enhance our overall well-being.
    • Being present in the moment fosters deeper connections.
    • Slow living can counteract societal pressures to be busy.
    • Engaging in hobbies can provide a sense of purpose.

    Sound Bites

    • "Slow down, slow the crap down."
    • "Engage in a slow mindful process."
    • "The process is the thing that's engaging."

    Chapters

    00:00
    The Essence of Slow Living

    01:37
    Engaging in Meaningful Activities

    04:38
    The Process vs. The Outcome

    07:40
    Finding Joy in the Journey

    10:36
    Mindfulness and Intentionality

    13:43
    The Dangers of Hustle Culture

    16:45
    Quality Over Quantity

    19:37
    The Importance of Relationships

    22:38
    Practical Tips for Slow Living

    25:47
    The Value of Engaging in the Process

    28:52
    The Second Screen Test and Media Consumption

    31:45
    The Need for Simplicity

    34:33
    Final Thoughts on Slow Living

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    52 mins
  • Ep. 160 Should My Wife Meet My Needs?
    Oct 2 2024

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    Spacemen, at this point, you should really start to look at us like AI; you ask a question and we answer it. And just like AI, we have the answers. If you ask, I can even draw you a picture with a hand and 7 fingers that mesh into one. Look out Gemini.

    On today's episode, Mike and Rob discuss meeting needs in relationships. Whose responsibility is it to meet needs? What expectations should have have? Don't worry. We'll tell you.

    keywords

    relationships, personal needs, self-sufficiency, emotional intimacy, communication, implied agreements, balance, support, expectations, connection

    takeaways

    • No one will advocate for you in your relationship except for you.
    • It's essential to understand what your needs are before asking others to meet them.
    • The balance between self-sufficiency and support is crucial in relationships.
    • Implied agreements in relationships can lead to misunderstandings if not clearly communicated.
    • Meeting needs is a shared responsibility, but individuals must also fulfill their own.
    • Expectations can lead to disappointment if not openly discussed.
    • Communication is key to understanding and fulfilling each other's needs.
    • Self-awareness is necessary to articulate what you truly need from your partner.
    • Relationships require ongoing effort and commitment from both parties.
    • It's important to recognize when a partner cannot meet certain needs and to adjust accordingly

    Sound Bites

    • "Just two bald dudes with a beard."
    • "No one's going to advocate for you in your relationship except for you."

    Chapters

    00:00
    The Balance of Self-Sufficiency and Support

    01:31
    Navigating Seasonal Changes and Personal Reflections

    04:36
    The Dynamics of Expectations in Relationships

    07:35
    Understanding Implied Agreements in Relationships

    10:44
    The Role of Communication in Meeting Needs

    13:37
    The Importance of Self-Validation

    16:51
    The Complexity of Relationship Needs

    19:37
    The Challenge of Meeting Emotional Needs

    22:42
    The Role of Vulnerability in Relationships

    25:56
    The Impact of Expectations on Relationships

    28:43
    Finding Balance in Relationship Dynamics

    31:44
    The Importance of Mutual Understanding

    34:48
    Navigating the Challenges of Relationship Needs

    37:43
    The Journey of Self-Discovery in Relationships

    40:47
    Conclusion and Final Thoughts

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    56 mins