Showing results by narrator "Simon Brett" in All Categories

Once again, the plumbing at Tawcester Towers is causing consternation for the Dowager Duchess, so - unusually for her - she gives her blessing for Blotto to take part in the 'Great Road Race' in his beloved Lagonda... so long as he wins. The first prize of 10,000 pre-War sovereigns will help towards repairing the leaky ancestral home. Blotto elects to take chauffeur Corky Froggett as his spare mechanic, while Twinks is despatched by her mother to the Highlands, to paint water colours and bag herself a wealthy husband.

Tawcester Towers, the family seat of the Lyminster family, has suffered an unwelcome injection of distant cousins - so distant that they aren't even British! Count Igor and Count Lyudmilla Bashusky had to flee Russia after the Revolution and have spent the intervening years building up debts in the hotels of Europe's capitals and sponging off ever more exasperated (and distant) relatives.

Due to financial hardships at Tawcester Towers, the Dowager Duchess has decreed that the only way the family fortunes can be restored is to marry Blotto off...to an American! Reluctantly, Blotto, together with Twinks and his trusty chauffeur Corky Froggett set sail.

The Dowager Duchess has decided to sell off the less important family possessions. Blotto and Twinks are dispatched to help the valuer. He spies some Egyptian artifacts and in some excitement rushes back to London, leaving Blotto and Twinks alone in the attic, where they are drawn to a sarchophagus decorated with hieroglyphs. Twinks starts to translate: "Anyone who desecrates this shrine will be visited by the Pharoah's curse..." - just as Blotto prises the lid off.

Having been booked to give a talk at Fethering Library, successful author Burton St Clair invites his old friend Jude to come along. Although they haven't met for 20 years, Jude is not surprised to find that St Clair hasn't changed, with his towering ego and somewhat shaky relationship with the truth. What Jude hadn't been suspecting, however, was that the evening would end in sudden, violent death. More worrying, from Jude's point of view, is the fact that the investigating police officers seem to be convinced that she herself was responsible for the crime. With the evidence stacking up against her, Jude enlists the help of her neighbour Carole.

Having decided to redecorate Woodside Cottage, Jude has engaged the services of local man Pete, who has painted and decorated the homes of Fethering residents for many years. Pete is currently working on Footscrow House, a large Victorian building being converted into holiday flats. Whilst at 'Fiasco House', Jude and Pete make a surprising discovery behind a wall panel: a woman's handbag! The casual discovery becomes serious when the police identify the handbag's owner as Anita Garner, a young woman who vanished in suspicious circumstances 20 years earlier.

Declutterer Ellen Curtis has been working to bring order into the life of Cedric Waites, a recluse in his eighties who hasn't left his house or let anyone inside it since his wife died. On one of her regular visits, Ellen finds the old man dead. Sad but, given his age, perhaps not unexpected. Until the police raise the suspicion that Cedric might have been poisoned! The cause seems be something he ate, and as Ellen cleared away the old man's food containers, she is under suspicion. As is Dodge, who works for Ellen and has unhelpfully done a runner.

The two aristocratic siblings Blotto and Twinks are once again launched into another death-defying adventure, this time in the civil war-torn republic of Jalapeno, in Mexico. But how did they ever get to such a foreign and distant land in the first place? For Twinks it was an easy decision - to escape her mother's match-making attempts she sets out to visit her old friend, Begonia Guiteras, who lives in Jalapeno, which is fortuitously on the doorstep of an Aztec dig Twinks wants to work on.

Originally broadcast on Radio 4 in 2003-4, We’ve Been Here Before is the topical, satirical, historical panel game that aims to show beyond all doubt that there’s nothing new in the news. Hosted by award-winning comedian, broadcaster and Whose Line Is It Anyway? star Clive Anderson, it takes a wry, witty look at long-gone days through a present-day lens, as the panellists battle it out to discover who’s got the best memory for detail when it comes to raking up the past.

The affluent seaside resort of Smalting is unaccustomed to crime. So when human remains are found beneath the floorboards of a beach hut, the community is awash with suspicion. Amateur sleuths Carole Seddon and best friend Jude are drawn into the mystery, and their suspicion quickly falls on attractive Philly Rose, a young Londoner newly arrived in the area, whose boyfriend has recently vanished.

'What? You mean the earl does it for money? That's way beyond the barbed wire!' This explosion of disgust from Blotto is provoked when Twinks informs him of the activities of the Earl of Woking. The gentleman in question is owner of Clusters, a stately home not far from Tawcester Towers, and he has been renting out parts of Clusters for private functions - and charging his guests! The discovery of this appalling lapse in aristocratic behaviour sets Blotto and Twinks off on their latest adventure.

A quick trip to the capital goes horribly wrong when Blotto and Twinks get accidentally involved in London's criminal underworld. It starts innocently enough at the intimate review 'absolutely everyone is talking about', Light and Frothy, where its glamorous star, Frou Frou Gavotte, has rather taken the fancy of Blotto's school friend Giles 'Whiffler' Trumpington. But while Blotto and Whiffler wait for the star outside the theatre to take her to dinner, Whiffler is seized and manhandled into the back of a cab which then drives off into the night.

Carole Seddon's son is soon to be married to Gaby. But Marie and Harold Martin seem desperate to keep plans for their daughter's big day as low-key as possible. After a quiet engagement party, Harold disappears...only to be found dead the next day in a burnt out car in Epping Forest. Carole discovers that the Martins are hiding secrets that can be traced back 30 years, to the murder of Marie's best friend. Now the girl's killer has been released from prison and is back in his old stomping ground.

Blotto and Twinks are off on another adventure - and this time they're bound for the Alpine village of Luzvimmen in Switzerland, where Blotto participates in racing the prestigious and very fast Croissant Run, though someone seems determined to sabotage his chances. Twinks, on the other hand, is on a mission to rescue her friend's sister from the sinister finishing school she is trapped in - the Convent of the Sacred Icicle.

Another hair-raising adventure featuring the aristocratic brother and sister sleuthing duo! The end of the cricket season spells gloom for Blotto until he is invited to bat against the Hollywood cricket team out in sunny LA, where rain never stops play. And so begins the latest adventure for Blotto and his supremely gifted sister, Twinks.

As the First world War rapidly approaches, we arrive in a sleepy south coast town where Max Carrados, the celebrated blind detective, is soon investigating the sudden death of the local museum curator. All is not as it seems, as our blind hero finds himself on the cliff top in a duel to the death with the ruthless German spymaster who is the one who knows The Secret of Headlam Height.